Thursday, 24 October 2013
Banana's, Orange Juice and Death Threats (Europe 1991 Part 2)
Each Tennis player no matter what age , has his or her own 'ritual' regarding diet , pre and post game routine or fitness schedule . In Europe 1991 my breakfast routine was simple , bananas and 'Oranjina' (orange juice) , very different from my touring buddies' diet , they ate coco pops .
I was looking for that 'edge' as my standard was not as high as Brett and Pete's so any little advantage was going to be of benefit to me . One morning at a Formula 1 ( low budget European accommodation ) I could not locate my staple diet, my concern was that the other two had eaten and drunk it .
After spending many days and many kilometres in a car small enough to be a toy that you could place on your mantle piece the sense of humour was not where it was when we first arrived on the other side of the World . I remember vividly threatening to kill at least one of them unless my breakfast was found. I can't remember what the outcome was but no one lost their life that day.
Driving to tournaments in a very small vehicle with 'Le Car' written on the side of it left us open to many elements , not just abuse. Whenever we saw a truck driving up behind us it was a concern that we may end up as part of their cargo , 'Le Car' was a daily character builder.
I don't know why but I was always relegated to the back seat , no respect for the 'senior' tourist , but I let them know I was there. One day as Pete was off in fairy land with his singing I asked a polite question "Any chance you could shut up thanks Pete " ? 'The Horses' by Darryl Braithwaite was really starting to wear thin). This was Pete's favourite song , he had his headphones on and he simply played it again and again and sung it over and over.
I gave him the chance but he didn't take any notice so I did what any bloke would do , leaned through from the back seat and smacked him in the ear , threatened to kill him if he didn't shut up . In a car that lacked a radio , silence for the rest of the trip was 'music to my ears'.
At a truck stop Brett and I discussed the idea of leaving Pete on his own as he went to the toilet , my theory on the whole thing I felt had merit . Peter was taking up valuable room and without him it would free up my leg space in the backseat of a car that I was prepared to set fire to at any opportunity and look at public transport . Our concerns however were, 'what will we tell his folks back home' ? So we waited until Pete finished his business and carried on in Le Car.
When travelling in Europe I felt it necessary to speak 'European' but Pete had a bad habit of saying town or City names as he read them while reading maps. One sticks in my mind in particular, a town named Mioux. I was adamant that this was to be pronounced Mow, as in Cow, Pete had other ideas , he called it Me Ox.
This at the time was the final straw. I not only threatened to kill him again unless his etiquette improved but I also made a point of letting him know that his haircut was starting to get on my nerves . (Possibly 'Small Car Syndrome').
At a French Bakery one morning Pete actually lost it and in fact threatened to kill me. I still don't recall what I did to upset him that day, probably the fact that I was simply breathing.
Such a pity we didn't have You Tube back then and a video recorder as I believe our fortune wouldn't have been made on the tennis court , but on the internet.
I was looking for that 'edge' as my standard was not as high as Brett and Pete's so any little advantage was going to be of benefit to me . One morning at a Formula 1 ( low budget European accommodation ) I could not locate my staple diet, my concern was that the other two had eaten and drunk it .
After spending many days and many kilometres in a car small enough to be a toy that you could place on your mantle piece the sense of humour was not where it was when we first arrived on the other side of the World . I remember vividly threatening to kill at least one of them unless my breakfast was found. I can't remember what the outcome was but no one lost their life that day.
Driving to tournaments in a very small vehicle with 'Le Car' written on the side of it left us open to many elements , not just abuse. Whenever we saw a truck driving up behind us it was a concern that we may end up as part of their cargo , 'Le Car' was a daily character builder.
I don't know why but I was always relegated to the back seat , no respect for the 'senior' tourist , but I let them know I was there. One day as Pete was off in fairy land with his singing I asked a polite question "Any chance you could shut up thanks Pete " ? 'The Horses' by Darryl Braithwaite was really starting to wear thin). This was Pete's favourite song , he had his headphones on and he simply played it again and again and sung it over and over.
I gave him the chance but he didn't take any notice so I did what any bloke would do , leaned through from the back seat and smacked him in the ear , threatened to kill him if he didn't shut up . In a car that lacked a radio , silence for the rest of the trip was 'music to my ears'.
At a truck stop Brett and I discussed the idea of leaving Pete on his own as he went to the toilet , my theory on the whole thing I felt had merit . Peter was taking up valuable room and without him it would free up my leg space in the backseat of a car that I was prepared to set fire to at any opportunity and look at public transport . Our concerns however were, 'what will we tell his folks back home' ? So we waited until Pete finished his business and carried on in Le Car.
When travelling in Europe I felt it necessary to speak 'European' but Pete had a bad habit of saying town or City names as he read them while reading maps. One sticks in my mind in particular, a town named Mioux. I was adamant that this was to be pronounced Mow, as in Cow, Pete had other ideas , he called it Me Ox.
This at the time was the final straw. I not only threatened to kill him again unless his etiquette improved but I also made a point of letting him know that his haircut was starting to get on my nerves . (Possibly 'Small Car Syndrome').
At a French Bakery one morning Pete actually lost it and in fact threatened to kill me. I still don't recall what I did to upset him that day, probably the fact that I was simply breathing.
Such a pity we didn't have You Tube back then and a video recorder as I believe our fortune wouldn't have been made on the tennis court , but on the internet.
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